When Harry Met Sally

When Harry Met Sally

When Harry met Sally he could not believe his luck. Sally was everything that Harry had ever wanted in a girl, open, honest, creative and playful.  When Sally met Harry she finally felt like she could  be happy. Harry was everything that Sally had ever wanted in a guy, caring, thoughtful, supportive, and adventurous. The two felt smitten with each other and could see no wrong in the other.

 One day Sally said something to Harry that reminded him of the way his mother used to criticise him.  Harry then reacted in a way that reminded Sally of the angry tone her father used to speak to her.  All of a sudden Harry started to notice things in Sally that he wasn’t aware of before and Sally started to see things in Harry that she hadn’t recognised before.

 They both tried to push this away but as time went on they discovered more about each other that made them feel angry, hurt and misunderstood.  Soon both Harry and Sally felt like two different people. Harry noticed he got impatient easily and tried to control what Sally did.  Sally observed that she would cry over littlest of things and compromise for the sake of peace.

One morning they both happened to enter their bathroom at the same time to brush their teeth.  As each of them looked at their reflection a small voice inside of them asked “Is this really me?” and then “Is what I think of another really them?”  Harry looked at Sally and Sally gazed back at Harry, they both said “sorry” in unison together.

Harry and Sally traced back to the point when their relationship started to change.  Harry spoke openly about the criticism he received from his mother in his childhood and Sally shared her feelings around the anger she experienced growing up with her father.  As they listened to each other they felt the wall that existed between them crumble and dissolve.  All of a sudden Harry started to notice things in Sally that he was aware of before and Sally started to see things in Harry that she had recognised before.

“No external source can ever be blamed for our emotions, as all our responses to external experiences reveal the state of our inner being” Mike Robinson author of The True Dynamics of Relationships